At the end of the year staff meeting in May, I was presented with the “Therapist Award” because I listen to everyone’s issues. That is certainly a big part of being both a leader, but also a principal/teacher with children. It is an honor to be trusted by so many at our school.
However, an aspect of the job is knowing some of the goings-on both on campus and off. Changes in the system can have ripple effects at our school. Issues at home can affect students in a very real way. Difficulties with or between staff can undermine culture and collaboration. All of these are, I believe, valid reasons to inquire and listen in on what is happening.
However, I do think there is a very real temptation to engage in gossip.
I think this Aletia article by Msgr. Pope does a great job of discussing gossip and would like to highlight one section:
It remains true that we sometimes must have necessary conversations about others who are not present. Perhaps we are seeking advice about how to handle a delicate situation. Perhaps we need encouragement in dealing with a difficult person, or need to do legitimate fact-checking. Perhaps, especially in professional settings, we are asked to make and give evaluations of colleagues, employees, or situations. However, in cases like these we need to limit the scope our conversations to what is necessary and include only those who certainly ought to be included.
It is that titillation of being in the know or of then spreading that knowledge which is the sin of gossip, I believe. Finding out about someone leaving a job or difficulties at home is helpful when it assists us in better serving and supporting our students and teachers. It is wrong to go fishing or to discuss matters apart from that – I believe.
For the sin of gossip, forgive me Lord.
A brief aside from the Oxford Dictionary:
Origin
Late Old English godsibb, ‘godfather, godmother, baptismal sponsor’, literally ‘a person related to one in God’, from god ‘God’ + sibb ‘a relative’ (see sib). In Middle English the sense was ‘a close friend, a person with whom one gossips’, hence ‘a person who gossips’, later (early 19th century) ‘idle talk’ (from the verb, which dates from the early 17th century).
I find it fascinating that our word for Gossip arises from “god sibling” – it’s always those closest to us that share our secrets or spread our information.
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